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death occurs, knowing how to comfort those left behind is not easy. As
difficult as it is to know what to say, sending funeral flowers can be
sometimes even more difficult. Just what is appropriate to memorialize
relatives, or people to whom you are not related? How about those you
have not personally met, such as the wife or husband of someone you
know.
Does it matter which type of floral arrangement I
choose? What is appropriate to send for a cremation?
Yes, there are rules of etiquette that dictate what
types of floral arrangements are appropriate, based mostly on the
sender's relationship with the deceased.
Anyone may send floral baskets or living plants. They
are especially appropriate when the sender had a closer relationship to
the bereaved than to the deceased. These baskets are generally of an
all occasion type, and are sent to the bereaved's home or workplace.
Sympathy baskets, sent to the funeral home or the
bereaved's home, are appropriate when sent by family, or those who had
a deeper, or formal relationship with the deceased.
Floral wreaths, crosses, and sprays, available in many
sizes, are appropriate when sent by anyone other than those not
acquainted with the deceased. The exception to this would be
associations that would like to honor the deceased for service during
their lifetime.
Younger children, or grandchildren of the deceased, will
like to honor them with lid arrangements. These, as well as casket
covers, are traditionally reserved for family members. Should you wish
to send an arrangement of this type, be sure to ask the family first.
Floral arrangements by good friends or family
members are generally tributes. You may memorialize someone by
choosing a special design based on an aspect of their personality,
their occupation, an association membership, forces connection or a
hobby. Other tribute arrangements are available as well. Tributes are
also appropriate, given by anyone, in the case of cremation.
In the case of cremation, much depends on whether a
funeral service is planned. If so, you may choose a tribute arrangement
or any other type of arrangement not reserved for family members. If
there will be a memorial service at the bereaved’s home, or if there
will be no services at all, it is more appropriate to send an
all-occasion type floral basket arrangement.
Is it alright to send brightly-colored flowers for
a funeral?
Certainly. Bright flowers can reflect on the energetic
personality of the deceased. They may be chosen to send a message about
how we felt about that person - that, in life, they gladdened our
hearts and made us feel happy to have known them.
Would it be all right to send flowers if the death
notice requests a charitable donation, "in lieu of flowers"?
Yes. Flowers at the funeral service not only add warmth
and life to a somber event, they are a tangible tribute. They let the
bereaved know, visibly, how much their loved one touched the lives of
others. Just as we would never choose not to send sympathy cards, offer
assistance, or donate food when asked to make a financial contribution,
flowers are always appropriate and appreciated.
May I send a live plant to a funeral home? If so,
will it be sent to the family afterwards?
Yes, it is appropriate to send a green or flowering
plant. Some funeral homes will deliver plants or flowers to the
bereaved's home after the memorial services, if specified. Others may
require that the family take them home with them. Ask the funeral home
staff about their policy.
Can I send flowers in a glass vase to a funeral
home?
From an etiquette standpoint, this is absolutely
acceptable. However, some funeral homes have rules about certain types
of arrangements. If the arrangement you would like to send is anything
outside the realm of traditional sympathy floral designs, you should
consult the funeral home concerning their policy on such arrangements
before ordering.
Are there special considerations when sending
flowers as a group? How should we sign our names?
Sending flowers as a group is a very good idea. When
mourners pool their financial resources for one arrangement, it can be
that much more special, and will have much greater impact. Gift cards
are large enough to hold a number of names. However, if the list of
names is very long, you may choose to identify yourselves by family,
group, or department if coworkers. In either case, you should supply
one contact name and address so that the family can send thanks.
I've missed the funeral! Is it OK to send flowers
to the family's home? If so, for how long afterwards?
Absolutely! Flowers are always appreciated, no matter
when they are received. Even if you will also be attending the funeral,
sending flowers to the bereaved's home is a wonderful gesture. Some
people choose to send flowers a week or so after the funeral, after the
necessary chaos of a death. It has actually become popular to send
flowers to the home over a period of time after the funeral to remind
the bereaved that we are still thinking of them and their loss.
Where can I find a suitable florist for my funeral
flowers?
This is an area where using a local florist is often
more appropriate as nearly all local florists have lots of experience
in providing funeral flower arrangements and there are some florists
that specialize in this area. Your local florist will be able to create
and theme a unique floral tribute based on the life of your loved one
and offer excellent advice and guidance as to what flowers and
arrangements will be most suitable. Local florists are usually more
flexible in the delivery of your flowers and much more sensitive to the
needs of the situation in terms of when, where and how the delivery
will take place.
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